Depression is not a subject that I knew from the inside. I have seen it up close in others, but that really doesn’t give one a good understanding of it, so I’ve just found out. Also, I am far from an expert and these are just my first time anecdotal findings.
Many months ago, I had sadness. I had a lot of sadness. But thoughts and ideas still mattered, one way or another. A few days ago, I started to feel like my decline had started to close in and threaten everyday life, not just sports endeavors. I entered a period where nothing seemed to matter. Things that should be enjoyable to me were not. I was distracted and off in some distant blah place in my head. I have had sadness many times in my life, though no more than the next person, but this perhaps was the first time that nothing was worth thinking about.
Today, I went for a long social bike ride with my Love and many of my friends. I wasn’t even into this at first. I was pretending to some extent.
Joyfully, several hours in the spring sunshine with flowering plants and smiling friends is a very powerful medication. If it could be bottled and sold at a pharmacy, many more people would be cured.