In the past I have been brave, not because I really am brave, but because I was good at things. I knew that I could do it. Usually, there was much thought going into everything I did. I was not a “hold my beer” kind of guy. Others were sometimes impressed, but I wasn’t. It was thought, practice and execution of what I knew I could do.
In bicycle racing, I used bike handling skills to the fullest extent to try to offset others being stronger. I didn’t mind. I loved that angle.
This has taken me a long way down the road in my present situation, but I fear that I am running out of tricks. Some people are still fooled by the magic act, but I can barely move my legs now. I can’t turn over in bed without having solid things to grab on to.
I think that my strategy of covering for, and hiding deficiencies is a very good one. It gives a person interesting tasks to work on. Complaining is completely useless and diminishing. However, it is getting harder to feel as “brave” as I was before.